|—||Debbie Thornberry, Mistress of the Backhanded Compliment, from the Wild Thornberrys Movie|
Somebody posted a thread on Ask Reddit asking “How does your favorite movie change when the protagonist is replaced with Batman?” My favorite movie is Spirited Away, so I thought about it, and then came up with an answer so good, I thought I’d share it here:
This is actually really good, because he’s not Batman for most of it. Chihiro, in the movie, is eight, the same age Bruce was when he lost his parents. He’s still a child, and as a spoiled rich kid, a bit of a crybaby. It’s mostly the same. He goes on the magical journey and everything, maybe Haku is replaced with a female dragon for him or something, and at the end, when Bruce Wayne is told to pick out his parents, he accurately guesses that none of the pigs are his transformed parents. He’s right, and gets to go free, but not with his parents, because he then learns that they were accidentally killed and eaten in an oversight by the spirits of the bathhouse. As for how he gets home, let’s say Alfred was waiting outside the gate to the spirit world with a car or something.
Bruce swears vengeance on the spirits for the ordeal they put him through, only to make him lose his parents. He spends the next 15 years learning martial arts, science, detective work, and the ways of the supernatural, all while honing his body and mind to perfection. He returns to Japan years later dressed as a bat, and becomes Koumori, the legendary spirit-hunter.
So, Elseworlds Tale, anybody?
Remember that time Disney made a movie about intercultural unconventional PoC families trying to deal with CPS, unemployment, racism, colonialism, grief, and anger, and nobody was a princess?
I know, it seems pretty improbable.
I feel like analyses like this are really trying too hard.
You can certainly see those things and make arguments for them, but Lilo and Stitch was ultimately a movie about how being different isn’t bad, and the importance of loved ones who can accept you for who you are. It certainly has very mature elements and harsh bits of reality you wouldn’t expect in a Disney film, and it’s one of my two favorites movies of all time, but at its core it’s a very simple story with a very simple message, which is what makes it so great.
We at CCS have several bones to pick with the entertainment industry, but only a few as prominent as our complaints of the movie industry’s current stratagem. We frequently lambast Hollywood’s complete lack of imagination, their stubbornness to take chances with new ideas, their sheer laziness by pandering to the lowest common denominator (i.e., Michael Bay, James Cameron et al), and rehashing old ideas for a quick profit.
Sequelitis and movie reboots are nothing new, but the sheer amount of them in this day and age is nothing short of obscene and insulting to the people who they’re meant to entertain. However, are they the industry’s attempt to squeeze blood from a rock, or are they simply providing a service for people who clamor for new stories with their favorite fictional characters and facelifts to their favorite franchises?
Join B-Mask, LaughingMan, and CineMax as they share their frustrations with Hollywood’s outrageous lack of imagination (or shame), challenge some of the more questionable IP’s the studios have decided to revive, and, most important of all, promulgate the real reason behind the sudden inrush of reboots. The truth is once again more hackneyed than you think.
And tune-in two weeks from now for a sequel of our own: Part 2.
The CCS podcast is amazing and everybody should watch it.
ive been on this earth for 18 years and 51 days to be exact,and i still can not find a cartoon movie better than space jam ♥
Everything done by Studio Ghibli. Some choice favorites: Spirited Away, My Neighbor Totoro, Castle in the Sky.
Everything from the Disney Renaissance and beyond. Some choice favorites: Lilo and Stitch, Aladdin, Hercules, The Hunchback of Notre Dame, The Princess and the Frog, all of Pixar except for the Cars movies.
All of the DC Animated movies, including stuff based on the DCAU. Some choice favorites: Superman vs. the Elite, Batman: Mask of the Phantasm, Batman/Mr. Freeze: Subzero, Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker, Justice League Doom, Wonder Woman.
Also: Kung Fu Panda, Megamind, Despicable Me, the Rugrats movie, Pokémon 2000: The Power of One, Dragon Ball Z: Cooler’s Revenge.
There’s nothing wrong with liking Space Jam. It’s not a bad movie (at least it’s not as bad as everybody says), and hell, if it’s your favorite, I’m not going to say you’re wrong for it. Now, if Looney Tunes: Back In Action is your favorite movie, then there are serious problems.
SCREEAMS SCREAMING SCREAMING IM GOING TO VOMIT EVERYWHERE I AM
WHY WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS. WHAT ARE YOU PEOPLE~?
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WIHT YOU
THIS PLAYS IN THE ELEVATOR WHEN YOU DESCEND INTO HELL
I CAN LITERALLY FEEL THE DEEPS OF HELL ITSELF CLOSING IN ON MY MIND
WHEN I SAW THE PICTURE I LITERALLY SCREAMED AND HID UNDER MY CHAIR OH GODD WHJYYYY
this is still a thing…?
And just when I thought 2013 was getting off to a rousing start.
OH WOW. OH WOW.
THIS IS GREAT. THIS IS THE GREATEST.
Considering that Spirited Away is my favorite movie, I’m actually amazed it took this long for me to put something related to it on here.
Me: So what do you want to be for Halloween?
Little Girl: I think I should be Thor.
Her Mother: You know Thor’s a boy right?
Little Girl: Yeah and I’m a girl and I want to be Thor.
Her Mother: Don’t you want to be something pretty?
Little Girl: Thor is pretty.
She’s right, you know. Thor is pretty. If I were gay or a lady… DAAAAAAMN.
Chris Hemsworth. It is not fair how attractive you are. Save some for the rest of us.
Guys, hey, guys. Do you remember that time that Coulson called Natasha and she ended up forming the Avengers? Remember how she did that by digging up Bruce Banner and introducing Steve to him then was the voice of reason when Tony and Steve were bickering and then how she brought Clint back from being mind controlled so that they can be a team? Remember that? Remember how the Black Widow out smarted a god? Remember that time she kept her shit together when the Hulk attacked her, even though she was really scared? Remember when she knocked an alien off his flying scooter and figured out how to drive it despite it being extrateresstrial tech, then got her ass up to the top of Stark Tower, found Loki’s staff and saved the world from being invaded by turning off the machine?
Remember how she was the central character of the whole freaking movie?
Anyone else remember that? I sure do.
I love this post.
While that’s nice, you can argue that for any character. Example:
Guys, hey, guys. Do you remember that time that Coulson sent a woman who worked for him to find Bruce Banner, and he ended up being the most important member of the Avengers? Remember how he was needed scientifically to track down Loki, and Loki saw his importance as being the key to tearing the Avengers apart, and manipulated him so that he could eliminate his opposition? Remember how he came back to them because the team needed him to be the Hulk? Remember the friendship he and Tony had, where Tony was the only one who believed in him and was a genuine friend to him, and that friendship saved the day? Remember how even though he owed these people nothing, he got his shit together and controlled the raging beast within to save the world, just because he wanted to? Remember how he beat up a god? Remember how he could tear any fucking member of that team apart if he wanted to? Remember when he punched a giant robot space-whale-dinosaur creature to death, when nobody else could even touch it, and how his joining the fight kept the rest of the team alive and took out a giant number of the enemy’s forces, going up to Stark Tower, beating Loki, and essentially saving the world with his fists?
Remember how he was the central character of the whole freaking movie?
Anyone else remember that? I sure do.
See? The Avengers was a team movie. That means that all of the members of the team are equally important. They all had their own roles to play, and they all played them well. You can look into and overanalyze something as much as you like, but seeing what you want to see doesn’t make you right. Black Widow was equally important to Hulk, Captain America, and everybody else. Arguably, the only character who wasn’t as important was Hawkeye, and I’m sure that anybody who loved Hawkeye in the movie as much as this person loved Black Widow could prove me wrong.
Not trying to rain on anybody’s parade, but what made the Avengers work was that everybody was equally important. That said, I did love Black Widow in it. They made her a well-developed, likable character, instead of the token girl, and it was awesome.